I learned not too long ago that I have a tiny lizard living in the deep, dark dungeons of my brain.
Her name is Persephone, and she tries her darndest to keep me safe. At least that’s what she thinks she’s doing.
We all have a safety lizard. It’s that part of our brains that first developed in our prehistoric ancestors that helped them understand when to flee (a saber-tooth tiger!) or when to fight (we really need to eat this mammoth).
Most of us don’t have to worry about those types of life-or-death situations now. But our lizard brains still think it’s their job to protect us. So, when we’re faced with the choice of either asking for that raise or not, it’s our lizard brain that pops up and says, “You really need this job. A raise would be nice, but why jeopardize a good job by trying to get more. You may even get fired if you ask for more money!”
Persephone talks to me like that all the time:
- “If you can’t do that job perfectly, there’s no point in doing it at all.”
- “You better be careful how you talk to that family member because if you make them mad, no one will invite you to any family gatherings in the future.”
- “No one wants to listen to you talk about writing all the time, and you know that’s exactly what you’ll do at that get-together. You better not go.”
I’ve learned to recognize that Persephone’s attempts to save me are really all about my fears. And I’ve started talking back to her:
- “Thank you for your concern, Persephone, but I think I’ve got this. You can come along for the ride, but I can handle the situation myself.”
How I Met My Inner Lizard
I first learned about Persephone when I was part of a Book-Club-That’s-More-Than-A-Book-Club (It’s run by Sam Kimberle. You can learn more about it in the Creative Life Scholars Facebook Group). We recently finished reading Steering By Starlight by Martha Beck, and learning how to talk to our own lizard brains was one of our early exercises.
But the entire book taught us so much more. We learned that there are times when we hold ourselves in dungeons with no walls–only bars that we hold on to and peer through. We have so many preconceived ideas about what we can and can’t do that we hold ourselves hostage in our self-built dungeons.
Then there’s the way we tell the stories about the trauma that has happened to us. We hang on to those stories as if they make up our identities. We start “story fondling” by telling them over and over to anyone who will listen. They become comfortable. They become part of us. They become who we think we are.
In the Ring of Fire
Then there’s the Ring of Fire that we sometimes have to walk through. It’s not fun and can be frightening and heart-breaking, but we come out on the other side as better people. A Ring of Fire can be anything from an IRS audit to the demise of a long-time friendship–things we dread or wish never happened, but that we have no choice but to experience.
The author also taught us how to “bracket up,” so we could read about experiences that we found too woo-woo or unbelievable. By putting our brackets up, we could suspend our own beliefs and read the words without judgment, so we could understand without infusing our own beliefs into that understanding.
We learned about “shackles on” and “shackles off.” We all have those moments when we feel like we’re expected to do something, but it just doesn’t feel right? That’s a “shackles on” moment. Or when we make a decision that we know is exactly what we should do, even though our families and friends urge us not to? That’s “shackles off.”
I also realized that those times of déjà vu, when we feel like we’ve done something before, are real. Or when we dream about someone we haven’t thought of in years, and that very same person calls us the next day? Those are signs from the universe that we need to pay attention to. Or what if we keep having the same dream over and over? Our subconscious is trying to tell us how to solve whatever problems we’re dealing with. We (and this includes me) just need to pay attention.
A Prophecy and The Alchemist
I’ve recently read a couple other books that fit perfectly with Steering by Starlight.” They’re The Celestine Prophecy by James Redfield and The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho. The authors of all three books encourage us to not believe in coincidence. Instead, things happen when we need them to happen. We hear a certain song at just the right moment. We run into an old friend who tells us something that helps us solve a problem we’re experiencing.
Every interaction has a purpose and a reason. We just need to stop and figure it out. We have so much knowledge within each of us. And we each have specific skills that are old-hat to us but that are astonishing to others.
You may wonder how all this “woo-woo” talk fits in with me being a Christian. I have come to believe that God is the entity that makes all those “coincidences” happen. I have this habit of constantly talking to God in my head. You can call it prayer, but I think I’m just communicating with a very dear and all-powerful friend.
When someone says The Universe is listening to everything we say and think, I believe it is God who listens to everything I say and think. And it is God who puts people in my path or situations in my life that give me profound knowledge at just the right time. Even in The Ring of Fire, it is God who walks with me through the flames, who holds me as I weep, who picks me up when I fall down.
We each can have a profound impact on the lives of the people around us — if we only give ourselves (and others) a chance.
What do you think? Do you believe in the woo-woo? Do you experience déjà vu and strike it up to coincidence? Let me know of your experiences in the Comments section below or email me at susie@stix-n-stonez.com.
And tell your inner lizard to pipe down. You have living to do.
Until next week,
Susie from Stix-N-Stonez
1 thought on “Our Inner Lizards Just Want to Keep Us Safe”
Susie, this is a great review of “Steering By Starlight.” It makes me want to get the book and read it – thanks!
I don’t think it’s “coincidence” that you write about things that give me a different outlook on life. I believe it when the Bible tells us that we are so precious to God that He knows even the number of hairs on our heads. And along that idea, I agree with you that God places people and circumstances in our sphere of awareness for our benefit. This enlarges our relationship with other people and with Him. Does He cause me to make the poor choices that result in bad outcomes for me? No. He’s given me the free will to make choices; I am not a puppet that He strings along to move here and there.
What you call the “woo-woo”, I call the spirit realm. I think that ancient peoples were more aware of the spirit realm than we are today. Their lives centered around nature, and their Supreme Being. My 21st Century life centers around materialism and staying indoors to do more craft projects.
Your writing about the woo-woo and about our inner self is a good thing. Keep it up!
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